I think people know me as gay, perhaps queer, but not readily as bisexual. I have used “bisexual” to self-identify, but my female partner is known to the staff and I don’t think they necessarily make the distinction of my bisexuality vs. being a lesbian. I have also been quite self-conscious at times of saying “bisexual” in certain contexts because I feel like it might invite more questions than I care to answer, so I may default to “lesbian” or “gay.”
My advice to other bi women considering coming out at work? Make it a non-issue rather than hiding; it is more awkward to have a “coming out.” My strategy has been to simply – when relevant – discuss my romantic relationships or politics in a matter-of-fact tone, and although some people may blink hard or ask me to repeat myself, it has never posed a problem. In fact, I have been approached a couple of times by others complimenting my bravery or frankness, and appreciating my perspective. I am highly aware that my appearance as conventionally femme (or “casual femme”) may force people to check their assumptions or prejudice, which can elicit responses both positive (“oh, my apologies for assuming”) and negative (“you don’t look gay”).
Mitsy lives and works in Massachusetts.