by Grace Hedin
Grace, 24
They/Them. Interested in petting cats and watching Pride and Prejudice on repeat.
Inside boy, big grandma energy, my hair is always frizzy.
Can I tell you a secret?
I hate hiking.
The idea of walking up a mountain and tripping over tree branches,
sweating through my eight layers of clothing–
not appealing to me.
That isn’t to say I don’t like hikers–-
that’s my exact dilemadilemma.
Why is every single cute and funny person on Ttinder a fucking hiker?
If not a hiker, then a freelance artist that also rock-climbs on the weekends.
Why does every person I’m attracted to feel the need to move their body above sea level?
One time, I went on a date with a girl,
she asked what I like to do in my free time. I panicked–
a vision of her profile picture on loop in my head,
she looked really nice in hiking gear, I couldn’t myself–
I said something along the lines of feeling nature beneath my feet,
some bullshit about a runner’s high,
and next thing I know we’re doing a three-mile hike
up some mountain I can’t remember the name of.
The hike consisted of me telling her I was fine
as I panted my way up the trail,
and when she tried to kiss me outside my home I turned away,
too distracted by the sweat on my upper lip to consider it.
I blocked her number when I got to my room.
Grace, 24
they/them, sagittarius, ENFP.
please, for the love of god, do not take me hiking.
Grace Hedin is a poet based in Portland, Oregon, U.S. Their work has been published previously through the Portland State University public catalogue, titled The Weak, the Wicked, the Divine: A Collection of Poems.