Everything That Should Be Mine

Mar 1, 2025 | 2025 Spring - Pieces of the Puzzle, Poetry

By Bethany Gavine

Enchanted by the subtle and effortless feminine around me
The women in my life have caught me
I’m stuck in a perpetual sweet orbit
revolving and circling around and around and around again
Jupiter Mars Venus
My goddess i want to kiss your mulberry mouth
Hold the dainty bones of your hands
Yin sweeping over me
Earthy and dark, hushed as a secret swallowed by blue lips
Strong and dizzying as a nicotine headrush
After months of withdrawal
The moon has pulled her veil over my eyes
But still i can see yours swimming
Unblotted by the indigo clouds or lingering fog
Take your thunder-stained palms and show me all my harsh, sharp edges
Whittle them down until all the impurities have eroded
I don’t understand this feeling
Crippled by shame and guilt
Loyalty binds me, shackles or beautiful jewelry?
I know not the difference any longer
How could i wrestle with the thought that to gain back a piece of me
I would be losing you?
How great a sacrifice is too great?
I wish to be compared to a lamb, rearing to shed its coat
But i possess neither the innocence, nor purity, nor eagerness to confront my nature for this to be true
Forgive me my love for i know not what i am doing
I need a love like summer
Ripe oranges peeled open by tender fingers on sunny days
Juice spilling over those deft limbs
Nostalgic for my adolescence when sleepovers under lavender sheets turned into
Awkward affections
Hushed and secretive, the most delicious kind of romance
Forbidden fruits taste all the sweeter
Can i be so selfish?
Can i be so daring as to claim everything that should be mine?

Bethany Gavine is currently a student at Central Saint Martins in London, U.K. She is Scottish Trinidadian and has been writing from a young age. Other work can be found @bethg.poems_ on Instagram.

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