By Robyn Walters
Well, it isn’t all that bad. Of the LGBTQI+ acronym, I only use the L, B, and T. However, there is another acronym that serves to explain more about me and my history/journey: AMAB. It’s meaning, not always appreciated by some here, is Assigned Male At Birth. It adds another dimension to my membership and volunteering at BWQ.
I was a rather typical young lad until I discovered something at age nine: lingerie. It spoke to me at various levels in the beginning, but eventually became a major factor in my life. In my late fifties, the lingerie rationale finally became clear: in my heart of hearts, I was a woman. I told my then-wife. Our marriage crumbled. When I retired and moved—alone—to the Seattle area, I was able to be Robyn full time. Cross hormone replacement therapy changed me in ways other than my body. I looked at men in a completely different manner even though I had never been gay. My attraction to women didn’t change, so I was suddenly bi. I joined two online transgender groups: the ElderTG list serve and Susan’s Place (now on Discord). I have been a moderator of each place for over 20 years. I met my transgender husband on ElderTG. Shortly after we married–with our old gender markers on the marriage certificate—I had my gender confirmation surgery. My husband’s surgery came a year later. His letters are G and T, as well as AFAB.
So here we are. An 80+ year-old, apparently heteronormative, couple. Only our children, friends, and doctors know some of our alphabet soup.
Our challenges have been few—mostly familial—and easily overcome. Well, some of the paperwork changes were a touch bothersome.
But the result—living as one’s true self with proper passports—is nothing short of outstanding.
Bringing myself into a fully functioning, bi+ space where I can explore my bisexual feelings through action, however, will have to wait until my next lifetime. Hopefully, I’ll remember what I now know.
Robyn Walters is a married, non-practicing bisexual transgender woman. She is a BWQ proofreader and regular content contributor.