Review by Ellyn Ruthstrom
I heard Ruby Warrington on the podcast We Can Do Hard Things back in February 2024, just about the same time as we set the topic of Child Free for BWQ, so I picked it up at the library. Warrington discusses many different aspects of what she calls, “The Motherhood Spectrum,” which involves the varied experiences, conditions, family circumstances, etc. that shape a woman’s desire or aptitude for motherhood. She names the pressures and societal voices that are directed at women—in particular the pressure to adhere to a patriarchal image of motherhood. Early in the book, she poses some profound questions for the reader to consider their own feelings about motherhood, as well as what the reader would want to accomplish in their life. She encourages women to take the time to process these questions as part of their own exploration.
Throughout the book, Warrington explores her personal journey of choosing to be childfree and reveals a great deal of vulnerability, while examining her relationship with her mother, the various sexual and emotional relationships she has had, her abortion, and much more. Women over time have reframed the procreation choices that we can make for ourselves, and Warrington’s book does a nice job of analyzing that transformation and creating a space for women without children to appreciate their experiences.